Thursday, May 05, 2011

stop & sit

when savannah was on spring break, she texted me & proudly proclaimed
that she had been out to dinner with her friends and the chaperones.
what was the proud moment you ask?
that she was dancing with the moms
& knew all the words to the classic rock songs at the restraunt.
i've trained her well.
rolling stones,the eagles, james taylor,
elton john, the doobies.
the list goes on.

years ago, she would roll her eyes when i would explain the importance 
of appreciating all the music genres. now she knows! 

tuesday night, i had what felt like a billion things to do
when i heard the older two yell up the stairs...
"tell mom, they're doing fleetwood mac on glee".
fleetwood mac is my favorite. 
landslide. songbird. oh yes, indeed!

they were practicing prom hair
& just hanging out.

those nights are fleeting as my savannah heads out in a few months.
but in that sweet simple moment,
wild horses couldn't have kept me away from sitting down there with them.
just being.

i'm the worst about stopping
& maybe even worse about sitting. 
i seldom sit down & enjoy hanging out with the girls.
ugh.
that's so embarrassing to admit.
 usually in the late evenings i'm winding down. or spending time with dan.
i'm not a tv watcher 
however, as my girls have turned (in the blink of an eye. thankyouverymuch) into teenagers, 
i've realized some of the best quality time
(second to taking them shopping)
is in the evenings.
usually while they're watching their shows, or when they've come in after an event.

a mentor of mine, who has since passed away, wrote in her book
that some of the best quality time with her teenagers was late in the evenings,
when she might prefer to be sleeping. but that she tried to be available to them,
in the event they wanted to talk or share about their day.


if i could encourage anyone to do better what i wish i had done more of,
it would be to stop & sit.
just spend time with them when they're in their element.
granted it's usually when you feel busy, or tired.
it seldom coincides when you have a free quiet moment,
but stop & sit
& soak it all in.


you wanna know the funny thing about that night,
or
maybe it's not so funny...
i can't even remember now
what i thought i was so busy with.


21 comments:

Lori Lucas said...

Amen. It goes by way too quickly...and it is the 'nonspecial' moments that become very special treasures for the heart. Lori L

Ruth said...

Paige, that was beautiful! Having two girls, a teen and a tween, I love reading your blog and seeing all the great things you do for your daughters. As always, thank you for sharing.

CHH said...

Dear Paige,

You do encourage us with your words of wisdom.

Your chance has not escaped you.

I'm sure that you will continue to seek the opportunities.

I'm so glad that you still have more time with Savannah in the evenings as well as with the your three other daughters, Madison, Emily, & Caroline.

Have you thought of doing a game night, movie night, or potluck dinner night (where Savannah or each of the girls could invite a friend and they bring a dish or desert) until she goe's away?

I found this for you:

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift. That's why we call it the present. ~Babatunde Olatunji

I'm not sure I never actually knew who wrote it.....

Have fun being present!

Best,

Coastal Blue Ocean

what if it's sitting down to watch spongebob said...

would i be able to sit with a glass of wine? I did last night;-) you would be proud.

The Avery House said...

I love the photo of your girls practicing prom do's. Too cute! The thing that is most awesome about this post, Paige is the fact that you and your girls DO have things that you share together. You know each other well, you lvoe each other and you are friends. What an awesome treasure to share. It does go too quickly, but I am certain that you have stopped your busy life many times over to spend quality time with your four girls. They wouldn't have that special bond with you if you hadn't. Thanks for sharing this. I needed this reminder. Have a fantastic day and thanks for the tips on Florabella. Not even gonna go to Pioneer Woman yet. I think I would absolutely go mad if it's more difficult than Florabella. ;-)

Jboo said...

How sweet is that!! Have tried to teach my sons about the great oldies, but one did not even know who the Beatles were!! Yes, I have failed miserably in the music dept!

Love this post and your words of wisdom ring so true! My oldest graduates from medical school (how he got so old is really beyond me) on Sat -- another proud mom moment to be sure!

Enjoy those sweet times together!

Janet

Christina said...

yes mam!
just the other day, the house was a mess and there weren't enough minutes, in the day. but we were together and we were laughing and talking, like no tomorrow.
you're a good mama, and i am glad you shared that time with them.
XO
ps: i love fleetwood mac.

Kat said...

Paige, this is such great advice. That episode of Glee was fantastic. So many times my girls ask me to read to them, or draw them a picture and often times, my response is, not right now, Mommy's busy making dinner, or doing chores. I often think that this time in their lives is such a gift and I need to soak it all in before it's gone.

Lolo @ The Adventures of Stig and Lolo said...

I too have taught my children about REAL music...classic rock! I grew up with my parents in a band, so I myself was taught well :)
We took my son to his very first concert last year....Journey (his favorite!)

And Fleetwood Mac is my ALL-TIME fav band too! I got to see them for my bday a few years back in LA at Staples.....AMAZING. SERIOUSLY AMAZING!

slip4 said...

Paige, thanks for this reminder. My daughter finished her freshman year at college yesterday so she is home for the summer. She is a good kid, but I am anticipating many struggles with curfew times (we can't fall asleep til she is home) and she is used to not having anyone to report to. sigh. But, she and I do have good times together and I will savor those as we work our way through this summer. Love your posts!

LLH Designs said...

I love this post, Paige. So honest.

The photo of your girls practicing prom hair reminded me of the photo I posted of my youngest practicing a fancy hairdo on my oldest for her Easter singing/guitar playing debut. My mind was racing ahead to prom and weddings as I watched...knowing those things will be here before I know it.

Trying to sit with them more. Thanks for the reminder.

Love,
Linsey

Anonymous said...

Your girls are adorable!

Shannon said...

Watching tv(cartoons) with my girls before bed is always one of my favorite things of the day and I have always wondered what it's going to be like when they are older and are out and about or just want to be alone in their rooms. How I wish they could stay little forever!

Hood Canal Gal said...

Love your pics!
I hear you loud and clear, I'm headding that way soon! My girls are 7, 8 & 11. ....I needed this little snap shot. Seems like lately carving out a little time to catch up is getting harder and harder....

Here's to extended bed times so that mama's and babes can stay connected!

Thanks Paige!

xoxo
Megan

Jen Kershner said...

Good advice my tenderhearted friend.

Privet and Holly said...

Paige, you nailed
it, here....So much
busy-ness....when
the real bus-i-ness
of life is relationships.
Love this.
xx Suzanne

Between You and Me said...

okay...this is too much for me tonight...I looked over at my boys and they are growing up SO fast...turning into little men right before my eyes...9 and 11...the time is going by so quickly that I can hardly record the moments anymore....

I need to be better about joining them in their element...which for me, will mean learning how to do the dreadful video game thing on the weekends and watching fine shows such as spongebob squarepants and the like....ugh...."i think i can..i think i can...."

janet said...

We too watched Glee..My husband loves Fleetwood Mac..Me not so much..Well maybe a few songs...My girls always loved the old 70's songs along with their current hits and actually when we play the music now they tell us we are trying to bring back the 70's..LOL..Well so be it I say..That was when artists could sing and play their own instruments..Your girls remind me of mine when they were younger..My oldest use to do her sister's hair every year for every dance..They are 33 and 29 now and hard to believe the time has gone so fast..Love your blog and photos..Have a great Mother's Day..

Jackie said...

Love your story about Savannah & knowing all the words to the songs. I "trained" my son in the same way. He knows all the groups & songs that I grew up with, too. It makes it fun to go to concerts together. And, the older he gets the more he appreciates the old stuff.
I can identify w/ you in not being able to stop & sit down. I'm the same way, but have gradually taught myself to stop & take the time. It has made a huge difference once Blake moved away. I have learned (for the most part) to let things go; think about time in the grand scheme of life & say to myself "whatever I think I have or need to do, can wait. Life & relationships are far more important than dusting, vacuuming, etc.".
You will get there!!
xoxox

patty said...

i love your last paragraph... couldn't be more true.

happy mother's day to you~

DaShannon said...

I needed to hear that at this moment