compassion

 

i did a little light reading this summer.

the Hole in Our Gospel: What Does God Expect of Us?

& it completely wrecked me.

i picked up this book several months ago but life got busy 

 & it got returned to the library. unfinished.

then one of my good highschool buddies sent me copy

saying it had been a life changer for him.

life changer indeed.

i have never read a book like it

i actually started it months ago & trying to be all cool and a literary genius

i tried to read it simultaneously with a few others

but it grabbed my heart and attention.

i began to feel like an idiot for 'not knowing'.

for not knowing how millions, MILLIONS, of people live.

maybe i'm just too wrapped up in my safe & cozy

white slipcovered life of luxury

consumed with trips to target and playing my hobbies.

but now i know.

i may only know a little 

but i know

i know statistics

& i now know that while i may never be a world changer,

i can certainly change the world for one person.

one person at a time.

( i read 'kisses from katie' too which will also blow your mind. i'll share about that later)

i have followed compassion bloggers on various trips.

earlier this year i followed nester and her own life changing trip to tanzania.

i would lay my head down on my computer as the emotions just overwhelmed me.

i have a place in my heart for uganda.

i've been praying for months that somehow, someway

i'll travel to there.

many of our artisans are there & i want to meet them

hear their stories, take their photos &hug their necks.

there's also a special little fella there.

his name is brian...

 

i spent hour after hour on the compassion page

looking at the faces of so many beautiful children.

i figured we'd sponsor a girl

but as i looked only one little fella

was listed as living with his father only.

in an area with such a high percentage of HIV,

 i assumed maybe his mama had passed away.

well it was mother's day here in the states & i thought

clearly, he's the one we would sponsor.

meet brian, our little fella from uganda.

 

the day our packet of information arrived

i went to staples and printed his picture & made bookmarks for each of us 

i want us to commit to praying for him and his family every day.

a few weeks later our first handwritten note arrived from him!!!

 

we read about the ages of his sibling & with whom he lives.

he told us his favorite foods & what he loves to play.

and want to know another awesome thing?
now compassion has email set up

so you can email & send pictures!!!

 

he sent another letter last week

where the interpreter wrote that 

"brian and his family are thanking you for sponsorship and said that God should

bless you abundantly"....

bless me?

our little fella in uganda prayed that God would bless me?

how can that be?

i sat there all choked up and humbled

& tried to soak in the significance of those few words

and prayed that i will always carry the name of Jesus

& that brian will carry the name of jesus.

i prayed for his health & education

i prayed that God would reveal himself in a mighty way in the life of brian.

i prayed brian would be a leader in his community

and 

i prayed. one more time.

that one day i'll find a way to carry his name to uganda

& maybe 

just maybe

see the face of this beautiful child there

who prayed for me too.

Sponsor a Child

simple thoughts on a tough subject...

i wanted to address a couple comments i had a few weeks ago 

on the Choose Joy entry.

i sincerely thank each of you who commented

& especially my two readers who left such raw thoughts.

i won't quote them but you may refer to the comment section if needed....
 

in the entry, i had quoted kay warren's definition of joy:

"joy is the settled assurance that God is in control of all the details of my life,

the quiet confidence that ultimately everything is going to be all right,

& the determined choice to praise God in all things."

a

"settled conviction about God

quiet confidence in God

& a choice to give praise to God"

i had a couple comments regarding god being in control of all (emphasis on the all)

the details of our life

or not.

& i will say my friend susan left a most fabulous, scripture filled response

that you can read here too

i'll be honest with ya'll

& give you my completely un-seminary based, very simple thoughts regarding this subject.

please don't throw tomatoes at me

as i don't do well with conflict.
this subject has been tossed around by theologians for years
so i will delicately give just a few thoughts
of my own. i know. funny right?

i believe in the word of God.

period.

i also know that no one, none of us truly understands His ways.

& we don't want to truly understand His ways right?

would we marvel & worship a God we have all figured out?

i think not.

so we base our beliefs on the written word

and to argue over how we interpret some of that seems futile.

so

back to the original question.

i personally do not believe God is in control of every single detail of our world.

he's been all about us having a free will since the garden of eden.

do i believe He's ultimately in control & can intervene in the thoughts
& plans of man at any time?

absolutely.

He's the creator.

 i'm just a mom. i'm just a simple person who trusts easily

& obviously has no problem being transparent and sharing my thoughts.

when i first read kay's definition 

i honestly didn't get tangled up in the "does he control every single detail". 

i believe he's in control of my life.

that i'm in the palm of his hand.

i do.

while i've never been on the front line of a war

i didn't survive the holocaust

or any other horrific , unimaginable situation

i have seen my share of death & dying.

i've watched many small children battle cancer

& i've sat beside them while they cried out in pain

& were scared to fall asleep because they were afraid they wouldn't awaken.

i've been with men younger than i am now when they passed away.

i've watched grown men lay helpless in a hospital bed while disease eats away their life

i've prepared bodies after their passing moments after their loved ones said goodbye.

& as you know, i watched my own awesome husband lose a horrific battle with cancer.

i've lost babies before i could carry them to gestation.

i've seen sadness

but i've never doubted  Him.

i've never doubted He is good

that while He created a once perfect world

and a once perfect everything,

i believe He loved & because He loved

He allowed a choice. our way or His way.

in my heart i believe sickness and death and cancer and all the crap in this world

is not from him.

it's a result

of our broken world.

it broke in the garden when "we" were given a choice

& "we" chose our way.

i believe that the entire plan was that of redemption.
all along.
i believe that He knew.
all of it. all along.
before adam breathed a breath.
as beth moore speculated in her hilarious, yet brilliant way just yesterday
it's as if He God, looked at Jesus just before He breathed in to adam
& said...
you sure about this?

because He loved

because He is holy & just

He had a plan. a way for redemption

& that including coming to earth in the form of a man

& bearing all the sin upon himself

& enduring a horrific death

so that there was a payment made for the sin. the bad choice "we made"

(john 19)

jesus's death as payment for sin was never plan B.

one day we will have a new heaven & a new earth

we will see Him face to face.

what we see & what we understand now

is tainted because we are NOT God.

we are the created. not the creator.

but back to the issue in my comment section~

personally

i don't believe He controls every detail of my day

& 

i don't get all out of whack trying to figure out if He made me choose my nailpolish

or not. that doesn't matter to me.

does He allow or does He send?

good grief.

i'll be honest.

bottom line,

i love Him & trust Him regardless.
did He send?
did He allow?
i love Him & put all my trust in Him.
regardless

i just do...

please don't all ruffled up with me or disappointed in my simplicity.

i am introspective

i ponder

i like to figure people out 

i like a plan

& i like "to know"

but as far as many things i believe spiritually

& about our heavenly father,

i'm pretty simple minded.

"I tell you the truth, 

anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child 

will never enter it."

mark 10.15

i love this blog.

this outlet for me to share.

and my friend, i love that you are here.

i pray my words never cause anyone to stumble

&

i pray my words are pleasing to Him.

~~~

{all the images today were from a senior session i recently had the honor 

of photographing.

i was so moved as this beautiful young woman gracefully danced

before me that evening & i thought they seemed perfect for this post.

i've spent a lot of time thinking through what & even if i might respond.

this images seem simple and so pure.

as i hope you know my thoughts are in sharing my heart...}

a generation of peace

one of my favorite aspects of parenting is when, as the parent,

i have the opportunity to learn from and be inspired by my children.

savannah has been working as an intern at our church all summer, 

primarily with the middle school, which is awesome for caroline!

she's doing a fabulous job ( as per the youth pastor).

one of the outreach opportunities our church has is called generation salaam.

we load up several busses with students and adults

(sometimes upwards of 200 folks)

& head over to clarkston.

i've heard that clarkston is the most diverse square mile in the world.

many are refugees and below the poverty level

our adults work with the men and women there by teaching English classes and business skills. 

 the students spend time tutoring, playing with, and sharing with the  children.

mainly loving on them for a couple hours.

we seek relationships strong enough to be able to talk about our faith.

i've had the opportunity to be a part of gen salaam for years

yet seeing an instagram of my girls loving on these beautiful children

was the most powerful inspiration of all.

i've had several sessions falling on wednesday evenings but finally had the opportunity to go.

it's a mission trip 

that doesn't require a passport

& only 25 minutes down the highway.

it had to be 90 + degrees.

the girls wear long skirts or pants

most of them had on little to no makeup

yet

their radiance as they hopped off the bus and began to love on those children

is one of the most beautiful things i've ever witnessed....

when i pulled up these images of savannah

( & some of emi when i wasn't there)

i'll be honest

seeing her do what she does & seeing her love for the lord

& for others in action

blew me away.

another moment when i have learned a priceless lesson 

& seen Jesus in one of my own...

 our noonday statement bracelet was a huge hit

with the little girls...

 the children do NOT want us to leave.

when we load the bus, a few of the adults have to stay off 

and watch because the little ones have been known to hang on to the bus...

  

our staff is currently working on an entire

dvd and informational packet for churches who desire to do 

something similar in their community.

i can hardly wait until tomorrow night to go again...

Jesus said, 

"Let the little children come to me, 

and do not hinder them,

 for the kingdom of heaven belongs

 to such as these."

matthew 19.14