Tuesday, November 06, 2007

A brave heart



11 years ago today Gregg lost his battle with cancer.
He had been diagnosed with metastatic melanoma & was under treatment for 7 1/2 months before he passed away.
Gregg & I were married for 5 years. During that time I graduated from nursing school, we bought a new house & a new car, he coached basketball & soccer, he taught high school & was also a youth pastor, I bought and ran a small business & we had 3 beautiful perfect little girls together.

Gregg was one of those guys who could do everything & do it well. He was an exceptional athlete playing both college basketball & running track. He & I had began our relationship by running together. He trained for marathons while I trained for the half! He had a very fun & outgoing personality. He was very smart & romantic. He loved to send me flowers. He was so creative with our time together....planning fun events for our dates & planning a wonderful honeymoon in the wine country. He loved to travel. He loved our convertible. He was loved & admired by so many. He was called "my best friend" by dozens of guys. He loved me & his precious little girls.

He was so brave while he faught that nasty disease. I truly believe that every day he faught, he believed he could beat it. He had hope no matter what the doctors told him,
11 years
sounds like a life time ago doesn't it?
Its funny
there are so many details from those days that i remember vividly~
what i was wearing while we sat across from the doctor who gave us the devestating blow.
the movie that ended just moments before he took his last breath.
there are more...
but there are so many things i don't remember.
i don't remember exactly who was in the hospital room with me as we watched him take his last breath.
i can't remember the last words we spoke to each other before he became unconscious.
11 years
Many of my friends that i have now didn't even know me back then, much less know of Gregg.
Many of the people I have contact with probably don't even know that i was a widow when i was 30 years old & all 3 of my girls were under the age of 3.
But in these 11 years I have learned many things
That the Lord saw every tear & did hear every prayer that was lifted for Gregg.
That life isn't fair but we have a savior who knows that
That i could make it, by simply getting out of bed each day & taking just one moment ( literally) at a time
That i could raise these 3 little girls who would really never know how many people loved & prayed for them
That he must be so proud as he watches Savannah, Madison & Emily from Heaven
That we will indeed see him again
Until then........

30 comments:

sugar said...

Bless you and your girls today on this anniversary, and always. Thank you for sharing.

Unknown said...

Paige,

Reading this made me cry....I am so sorry. I will be thinking of you and your girls today.......

Annie

Anonymous said...

Paige,
Thank you for the sharing today.
I still want to email you in length about my brother & his cancer. I just have not wanted to take the time to write it all out & re-live it.
My brother, also, was an avid sports fan. He coached Baseball and Basketball. He was a minister. He was loved by everyone.
It sounds as if there are many similarities that you & I could share about our special men.
I will work on that email. It does help to share things w/ others and especially someone who can somewhat relate.
Blessings to you & your family today.
Sincerely,
Jackie Carl
Marion, IN

Heather said...

Oh Paige, I did not know this story. It is heart-breaking. You are so strong and admirable.

Dawn said...

Thank you for telling us about your dear one.
God is so good to walk alongside us and sometimes carry us through these times in our lives.
Blessings on you this day.

Elle Jay Bee said...

What a beautiful tribute to an obviously wonderful man. I am so sad for you all that his life ended in that way, and so young, but I know you have been given a second chance, and again have a wonderful husband and father to your sweet girls.
You are obviously a great mum, as your girls certainly have so many proud accomplishments under their belts, and seem so happy...

All the best,
Linda

Somewhere In The Sun said...

Thank you for sharing your heart. May God continue to bring you and your daughters peace.

Carol Dunton said...

Blessing, Paige, to you and your daughters on this day. How beautiful to remember Greg in so many admirable ways. And what a testament it is that you have such a solid, sure faith in God.

May God continue his blessings upon your home...
vb

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing your story.
You are a wonderful testament to faith in God and the ability to move forward in that faith.

I'm so happy that God has blessed you with an equally wonderful man to love and appreciate you and your daughters.

~elaine~
roz_etta@yahoo.com

Jen Kershner said...

Paige,
What a heartbreaking story. How wonderful that he was blessed to spend his last days with you and his girls. Hugs,Jen

Katie said...

Paige,
I have been lurking on your blog for a few weeks and have been so encouraged by your love for your husband and children. I couldn't be quiet any longer after reading this post. I am inspired by your strength and reminded that our Great Comforter God can carry us through anything. I have been dealing with a fear of something terrible happening to my husband or daughter...you lived through it and look at how blessed you are now. Thank you for your witness!

Katie

Kristin said...

I remember his bravery and kind smile. I remember he used to snuggle with his baby girls so they would be able to bond with him. I remember watching you in awe as you choose to take each step in grace and trusting God no matter what. I remember when he got sick that it was in that period of time that he became my dear friend. I remember this verse from that time pasted on the hospital wall and think God did and still does indeed rejoice. "And I rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17. I think Gregg is in heaven looking down and so very proud of how you raised your girls. He is proud of each of them and the young women they are becoming. I think he is happy and couldn't have picked a better best friend in Dan to become the husband to you and daddy to your girls, and raise them in a way that is honoring to Christ and Gregg too. Gregg's life is a testimony in living and dying in strength, that God still wins in the end. For that I am so very blessed to have known Gregg and know you as my very treasured friends!

Kellie said...

What a wonderful, beautiful post. Thank you for sharing the wonderful things in your life as well as the hard things. It's so great to read of your hope through a difficult time and that we can praise our Savior even when we can't understand. Thank you also for reminding me to make sure I tell my husband that I love him, right at this very moment!

bethy said...

so beautiful, paige. bless you and your family.

3 Peanuts said...

Paige,

What a wonderful way to honor a man that you loved and the father of your children. It sounds like you were so blessed by his love and you continue to be blessed by the love of your daughters and your husband now.

I am so amazed at what strength you must have had to face each day as such a young widow and Mom. I know you had to pull yourself out of bed and move on for the girls. But I still am not sure how you did it. I am sure your faith in the Lord carried you through those cahlenging times.

I really admire you, Paige.

Kim

Anonymous said...

Hello, I just discovered your blog this evening. I just want to say thank you so much for sharing your story of your husband Greg. It is inspiring for your strength and a fabulous reminder to cherish each and every day. Thank you so much! I'm going to go hub my hubby and remind him how much I cherish him!
Cece

Jodee said...

Paige -- I just came across your blog too. What a wonderful tribute, and I truly admire your strength.

Meg said...

What a beautiful post, dear Paige. You are a brave survivor, and your love for Gregg shines through with the legacy that you have given your dear children...one of hope, compassion, love, courage, and faith. Thank you for sharing this touching part of your life with us. Gregg sounds like he was an exceptional person, and that he is an exceptional spirit.

Simply Me Art said...

I am so Very Sorry for your Loss. You are a Brave Mother and Wife. Thank you for sharing your story. Jamie

Carol Dunton said...

Dear Paige,
Thank you for your 'hug' this morning... I sure needed it...have had a difficult day/week/month and when I opened my email and saw your 'hug', made me weep a bit with gratitude. Thank you for your post...and your hug and kindness. You are an angel. Have a wonderful Monday!
xo
VB

LIBERTY POST EDITOR said...

Oh my. I wasn't expecting to read this when I discovered your blog this morning. You are an incredible woman and mother. My thoughts are with you today.

3 Peanuts said...

Paige,

Cannot find your e-mail address and wanted to ask if I could add you to my blog roll. I see a few of my buddies have found you too:) Your life experience and gentle grace inspire me.

Kim

Anonymous said...

Paige, thank you for the strength it took to share this story with us. So special. My thoughts are with you.

Unknown said...

Paige just moving...you and your family have such beautiful souls...god bless all of you on this anniversary!

amy said...

I only just found your blog today and I am struck by the elegance and grace of your faith. You are an inspiration in the way you have honored his memory by living a full life. Thank you for your strength and thank you for sharing your story with us.

Anonymous said...

amazing story!

Anonymous said...

your post has me in tears. what a beautiful tribute to a wonderful man. thanks for sharing your heart.

Tina Leavy said...

hugs to you and your girls.

Deb said...

Paige,
I just came across your blog too. You have such a beautiful family and what a beautiful tribute in this post!

Happy Thanksgiving to your family!
Deb

lizziefitz said...

God's Grace. Thank you for reminding me what I need to live daily.An attitude of gratitude.